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The longing

It is not unusual for me to ‘miss’ someone. Those people I really feel connected with, whom I feel the most happy around are people whose presence that I have always wished for. It is when that they disappear from your life that you truly understand what role they played. It sounds like a cliche, but it seems entirely true to me right now. The problem is that once our mind is accustomed to a mode of behavior and thinking, the shock of suddenly losing that maybe a little too much. It will take time and effort to adjust to the new reality, and before you know it, another change – another disappearance may occur. Such is life.

There is nothing fixed in life. Anything can change at any moment. Death can happen. Tragedy can happen. Betrayals can happen. People can move out. Friendships can break down, they can die, they can also start. I doubt at this moment if there is any constant in life, other than dread. I sincerely hope not, but it does not seem to me that anything else is likely.

It is best to anchor yourself not in someone else, but in yourself. Others may not be around forever. You will always be around for yourself. Being able to get yourself out of a bind without others, I think is really, really important. At the end of the day, you only have yourself.

Yes, I am promoting a rather rugged form of individualism, where we do not need others for our own mental stability. We should only require ourselves. Then again, I have not reached that end. It is a journey that I have only started.

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